Skillet - Awake and Alive

I'm at war with the world
And they try to pull me into the dark
I struggle to find my faith
As I'm slipping from your arms

It's getting harder to stay awake
And my strength is fading fast
You breathe into me at last

I'm awake, I'm alive
Now I know what I believe inside
Now it's my time
I'll do what I want 'cause this is my life

(Here, right now)
Right here, right now
Stand my ground and never back down
I know what I believe inside
I'm awake, and I'm alive

I'm at war with the world
'Cause I ain't never gonna sell my soul
I've already made up my mind
No matter what, I can't be bought or sold

When my faith is getting weak
And I feel like giving in
You breathe into me again

I'm awake, I'm alive
Now I know what I believe inside
Now it's my time
I'll do what I want 'cause this is my life

(Here, right now)
Right here, right now
Stand my ground and never back down
I know what I believe inside
I'm awake, and I'm alive

Waking up, waking up
Waking up, waking up
Waking up, waking up
Waking up, waking up in the dark

I can feel you in my sleep
In your arms, I feel you breathe into me
Forever hold this heart that I will give to you
Forever I will live for you

I'm awake, I'm alive
Now I know what I believe inside
Now it's my time
I'll do what I want 'cause this is my life

(Here, right now)
Right here, right now
Stand my ground and never back down
I know what I believe inside
I'm awake, and I'm alive

Waking up, waking up
Waking up, waking up
Waking up, waking up
Waking up, waking up

Who ever is reading this, take a look at yourself now.

Look at your situation now where you are in life.

Don't worry about anyone your with atm, focus on YOURSELF as an INDIVIDUAL person.

Who your with, who and/or what you sacrificed.

What do you do different now to what you did last year.

The people you miss

The things you treasure closely

The fun and bad things you used to do

The regrets you have now of what you did
The good memories that cause you pain now

Let me ask yo this.

Are you REALLY happy where you are now?
Was it all worth it?

If you replied with yes, then do you think everyone you know or have known are happy for you?

If no, then what are YOU going to do about it?

His eyes red,
Bags under his eyes so heavy and dark.
Sweat pouring down him face.
Hair all and messy.

All he ever does is look at his phone and wait, wait for someone to get in contact with him.
His phone vibrates every once and a while hoping it's that particular person but no gold.
Thinking back to the times that past he realizes they are over and the present is now.
Looking to what he has now he realizes what he has now is great and what he wanted.
Although realizing how much they have changed he doesn't know if it's worth it anymore.
Idling over the delete button in his contacts list, he hesitates.
If he should do it, thats the end of the past.
Bring on the future but the past can burn.

Sometimes feels like he knows hardly anything and everyone else knows everything... thats either a bad thing or a good thing.

If everyone else knows everything then they technically don't know anything coz they could be either telling lies or only know what you ask. Otherwise if they don't know anything then they either don't want to say anything to not sound like a smart arse or actually know know what your on about.

Smell
To smell something in your dream, indicates your past experiences and feelings you associate with that particular smell. Your dream is trying to convey a feeling with a familiar smell or scent.

Everyone that even has spoken to me, knows that i am PROBABLY one of the nicest guys that you will ever know, even after the shit has hit the fan i am still capable of forgiveness.Those that have known me for a long period of time know my limits and what can really set me off but even after that i can i don't even be mean to that person in front of them or anything.

Honestly... the ONE person in my ENTIRE life... is friends with my partner, bff's with my old best friend and pretty much everyone is on their side... and i ABSOLUTLY HATE this person, everyone thinks I'm overreacting for it; but lets see someone make YOUR life ( the reader of this ) hell and see how you feel about them afterwards. No kidding I'd rather DUMP my life and start over just to get away from ANYTHING to do with you, EVEN your name stirs me up and make shit worse.

Today i started picturing the gang walking around Wellington Central laughing like crazy. That pretty much put a crimp on my day to go along with the head-ache that Ashley's sister gave me. I suppose after 5 months or so of living in wellington hasn't been long enough for me to forget everything.

Every time i go to think about hanging out with you, i always remember what your replies were from the other 10 times i asked and decide not to.

I have come to the conclusion that i actually have no real friends now besides some of the people at work and the one person that stuck with me through all my bull-shit of which I have known four months less than you. Even then i feel very distant from that person and can't talk to anyone else in person about anything. 

Thanks