It could be worse

These blogs usually take some great reason to post, this I am not sure what the reason is, could be that I want to reach out to someone that has a caring nature, or just to get my thoughts out ( which could be done on paper instead ).

Over next 3 days I am doing double shifts at work in 2 departments, then going all the way to upper hut to sleep at 9 at night for an acceptable amount of hours ( as according to everyone that lives off no sleep ). This of course is very tiring and stressful on the brain when it wants to relax on a daily-weekly routine.

This of course is very good for my resume and reputation at the hotel which will lead me towards a better position in the coming years ( If I am still working there ). But something happened today that made me think a whole lot about my plan over the past few months where if its the right choice to stay away from the whole 'relationship' attachment situation to help focus on a future that's more than a shitty job, or to try to hold one and keep that on the brain too as it chews through the rest of my life with both good and bad consequences.

Today at work I was working in functions as a waiter clearing plates. A guest stopped me to ask me in a cheeky manner if he could see my ID ( This of course I couldn't help but put on my big smirk and ask if he were serious ). Explaining that I was heading onto 21 he cracked up laughing and blah blah blah... ( It was a hilarious moment... ).

Later on in the day, the same guest came up to me after I cleared his plate and started picking food off it ( probably shouldn't have let him do so ). But he mentioned someone there had their eye on me. Taking me over to her table and playing the game "Have you met James?" with her, as awkward as it was being she laughed and was just as confused as I was leading me to walk off and continue doing my job.

Walking home in shoes that yet again are wearing out and tear into the bottoms of my feet as they also fill with water, this with a long busy shift made a miserable lonely walk home in the night sky leading to the idea that living in a place with a couple that are in a depressed relationship is not a move that could be worth the odd few dollars that I am saving on rent in the Hut.

Filling a blue striped water bottle with hot water for me to curl up with in bed makes it a tad better. Yet it doesn't leave me with someone to talk to... ALSO leading me towards wanting a partner again?... Is it worse the trouble of what last year brought me?... I don't think so... probably yet another depressing night with my thoughts stuck swimming around in my sub-concious that is also mixed with a very tiring day.

Good Night World,
This Sloth is gonna push till its last breath